8 months.... have past..

Lets see, now 8 months and 2 days have past and I somehow seem to have not moved on even though everything around me has changed and moved on somehow; its as if another person is gone, but the world and everybodys life just goes on.. it makes me wonder, how much value our life really has when we exist, and the second we die, its as if we never really existed, all thats gets left behind is memories, which I feel I will forget with passing time... the last day i cannot forget, but i cant remember the week or the day right before. I want to remember all the details of my dad, but i feel with time, his details will become more and more faded.. and thats not something i can live with..... I just wonder if there really is the other side.. and if someday you do meet the people that pass away on the other side... i dont know. I want to write down and remeber so much but still I am unable to do so without losing myself way too much into it..
Each day just passes by but one day seems no different from the other now.. they all seem the same.. I try very hard to find happiness in each day somehow.. but what is happiness if I cannot share it with my Papa who lived for my happiness and sacrificed everything for me to give me happiness always..